Pot

[JC]

Ok. What do you do if you smoked pot last week and you've gotta take a urine test in a few days?

[manuel]

Uh-oh...
What did you do?

I guess there's not much you can do.
The tests are very accurate these days...

[Jedi Master Baiter]

Ahherghehehg;lclikcontihsnow!

Sorry, had to clear my throat.

[JC]

Uh-oh...
What did you do?

No, not me. My little bro. He's been drinking cranberry juice, but don't think that'll do much soon enough.

EDIT: Someone on another forum suggested getting a friend to piss into a hallow dildo, seal it, and then stick up your ass to keep it warm for the test.

[manuel]

Cranberry juice won't do anything.

The dildo thing... well... I don't want to imagine that.
On top of it it would be a crime I guess.

Why does he have to make a urine test?
Military service? Or is the new boss suspicious or something?

[Jedi Master Baiter]

Cranberry juice, pfft

Like poppy seeds do enough either.

[JC]

He's getting a local government job for the summer. He's only 16, so it's his first real job and he freaked out when he learned he had to take a test. He's thinking the best option -- 'cause our parents would kill him if/when they find out -- is to sabotage his own offer of employment so he's denied the position before taking the test. There just doesn't seem to be a good option for potheads these days, including Jedi's $40 synthetic urine kit: *200% Guaranteed*.

I had read somewhere that vinegar works well, but to drink that...

[Jedi Master Baiter]

Who said that was my kit? It's a kit, & where does it say 200%?

[JC]

I knew you'd like possession of that one. And for the 200%, look at the picture of the product.

[vealchop]

You should go rent the movie "harsh times".

The main dude in that flick is a guy trying to become a cop but he's also a habitual pot smoker. The way he beats the piss test is through the use of some clean urine, a syringe, and a helluva lotta will power. I'm sure you could guess what the procedure involves. Gotta be one of the most painful things to do to yourself.

My little bro is a HUGE pothead, so he can only find jobs that pay him off the books. Although I hear "Golden Seal" vitamins and a shitload of water can cleanse your system.

[JC]

Yeah...don't know what that syringe would involve, but sounds like it could hurt. I think my bro is gonna kick aside the job offer and find another job not requiring a test. Seems like the best option -- least risk.

[djdac]

EDIT: Someone on another forum suggested getting a friend to piss into a hallow dildo, seal it, and then stick up your ass to keep it warm for the test.

WTF?!

[manuel]

Yeah...don't know what that syringe would involve, but sounds like it could hurt. I think my bro is gonna kick aside the job offer and find another job not requiring a test. Seems like the best option -- least risk.

That would be the best thing I guess.

[Jedi Master Baiter]

You should go rent the movie "harsh times".

The main dude in that flick is a guy trying to become a cop but he's also a habitual pot smoker. The way he beats the piss test is through the use of some clean urine, a syringe, and a helluva lotta will power. I'm sure you could guess what the procedure involves. Gotta be one of the most painful things to do to yourself.

I just saw this movie last year.  It was a turkey baster.

Here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PAijBzGi4eo

By the way, I revived this topic.

[UglyJoe]

Haha, cool story.  It would really suck to go the turkey baster route only to find out they're doing a hair-sample test instead